| throws her hair back as she screams i dnt really wanna live this life!!!!!!!!!!! |
[entries|friends|calendar] |
|
|
Someone Ran Away With Her Innocense
|
|
|
| this sux! |
[
Aug
25
2005 @ 07:09pm ] |
Dixie Chicks- traveling soldier Two days past eighteen He was waiting for the bus in his marine greens Sat down in a booth in a cafe there Gave his order to a girl with a bow in her hair He's a little shy so she gives him a smile And he said would you mind sittin' down for a while And talking to me, I'm feeling a little low She said I'm off in an hour and I know where we can go So they went down and they sat on the pier He said I bet you got a boyfriend but I don't care I got no one to send a letter to Would you mind if I sent one back here to you Chorus: I cried Never gonna hold the hand of another guy Too young for him they told her Waitin' for the love of a travelin' soldier Over love will never end Waitin' for the soldier to come back again Never more to be alone when the letter said A soldier's coming home So the letters came from an army camp In California then Iraq And he told her of his heart It might be love and all of the things he was so scared of He said when it's getting kinda rough over here I think of that day sittin' down at the pier And I close my eyes and see your pretty smile Don't worry but I won't be able to write for awhile One Friday night at a football game The Lord's Prayer said and the Anthem sang A man said folks would you bow your heads For a list of local Vietnam dead Crying all alone under the stands Was a piccolo player in the marching band And one name read and nobody really cared But a pretty little girl with a bow in her hair
Lonestar- I'm already there He called her on the road From a lonely cold hotel room Just to hear her say I love you one more time But when he heard the sound Of the kids laughing in the background He had to wipe away a tear from his eye A little voice came on the phone Said "Daddy when you coming home" He said the first thing that came to his mind
I'm already there Take a look around I'm the sunshine in your hair I'm the shadow on the ground I'm the whisper in the wind I'm your imaginary friend And I know I'm in your prayers Oh I'm already there
She got back on the phone Said I really miss you darling Don't worry about the kids they'll be alright Wish I was in your arms Lying right there beside you But I know that I'll be in your dreams tonight And I'll gently kiss your lips Touch you with my fingertips So turn out the light and close your eyes
I'm already there Don't make a sound I'm the beat in your heart I'm the moonlight shining down I'm the whisper in the wind And I'll be there until the end Can you feel the love that we share Oh I'm already there
We may be a thousand miles apart But I'll be with you wherever you are
I'm already there Take a look around I'm the sunshine in your hair I'm the shadow on the ground I'm the whisper in the wind And I'll be there until the end Can you feel the love that we share Oh I'm already there Oh I'm already There
I'm missing you like crazy Kev i love you and Im so proud of you for doing what you do i miss you!!! I'm praying for my marine family i love you all be safe
|
|
| my bro |
[
May
07
2005 @ 05:54pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
i miss kev |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
andy griggs- if heaven |
] |
i havent updated in forever so much has changed it's not even funny, life kinda sux and has sucked for a long time, i still love all my boys lol and my brother called today and he is stil at bootcamp and it was the first time I'd heard his voice in 12 weeks, i started crying it was reallly hard to not let him hear me cry, bcz i didnt want him to be sad, but the good news is that he loves it he acts like its summer camp so im really excited that he knows he made a good choice, one thing that he did it was soooo nice he gets $3 grand just for doing bootcamp and he sent $150 of it home 100 for my moms mothers day gift which i went and got and he just gave me 50$ WHICH WAS PRETTY COOL! yeah so i got my mom a gold band for her thumb from kay jewelers and i got it engraved so it says USMC 2005 love kev, im sure shes gonna love it oh man but yeah im gonna post some pictures soon! ♥
|
|
|
[
Mar
30
2005 @ 11:16pm ] |
it was another amazing night of back rubs movies and beverages if i may say so myself ♥
|
|
| SPRING BREAK! |
[
Mar
28
2005 @ 11:29am ] |
spring break has been so fuckin amazing you dont even understand, I've been seeing all my guys everyday since thursday there so adorable and they make me so happy and i love being around them, i have no worries when im around them they make me feel so good and happy but yeah we went to whirly ball on friday and everyone was a lil crunked hahahahahha and lets just say there was blood by the end of hte game! and fuckin then we go to dennys and im sitting next to Erwin and some "fat fuckin cunt" in an illini sweatshirt kept staring at us so he fuckin yells out hey that fat fucking cunt in the illini sweatshirt is staring at me and he has his drink and its full of coke and he makes it go all over the table on purpose and doesnt even care just keeps a str8 face and since we knew the watrice she is alwasy our watric when they go there she gave him a glass but put a lid on it and he threw it again and none of it spilled i think that was the funnies night of my life and the car ride there was amzing in erwins truck and he fuckin crazy ass driving and fuckin oh man lmao and by the end of the night on the way home before dennys some fuckin russian in a neon thinkin he was a racer pissed erwin and zach off so we chased him but there were too many cops around bcz we were in aurora but the dude got out of his car and was like "vat are u trying to keeel meee?" hahaha and we just laughed at him but yeah there is much more to this but the gist of my story is that i love this spring break and i love all my guys your all fuckin amazing! and i love you! ♥
|
|
|
[
Feb
27
2005 @ 01:27am ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
confused |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
how do you get that lonely |
] |
this sux i fucking hate guys i like someone and i like someone but how o i know if its true this has happened before and i fucked things up bcz i dont know what to do ♥
|
|
|
[
Feb
21
2005 @ 08:59pm ] |
hes really gone and i just cant deal with this im so proud of him and i want whats best for him and i know the marines with take care of him but i just cant deal with this i cant stop crying im seriously having a breakdown and i dont know what to do im so upset and i just need someone to talk to ♥
|
|
|
[
Feb
19
2005 @ 04:03pm ] |
so yeah im really upset about kevin leaving but I'm gonna post all of his going away pictures like tommorow I'm gonna miss him and this is gonna be a really tough 87 days ♥
|
|
|
[
Feb
03
2005 @ 05:20pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed |
] |
I'm really sick right now and it sux ALOT...but o well yeah shit has been depressing lately im so sick of life in general i mean i thought shit would be better because i got a car and everything but its not and im so nervous about turnabout because iwanna ask alex arnold and im scared bcz he has given me so many chances and ive blown him off so many times and i like him alot right now and i hope he is willing to give me another chance like he is the only guy that i want he is perfect for me and i hope im perfect for him my parents love him too and he is sucha nice kid jshagl and as for dave screw him im totally done with that im sick and tired of feeling like a hook up to him so when he can get his feelings str8 than he can call me but until then im ignoring his phone calls i dont even care anymore but owelll im about to pass out im so dizzy at the moment so im gonna go lay down ♥
|
|
|
[
Jan
25
2005 @ 06:25pm ] |
brooke i know you wont talk to me but i dun want this to end our friendship! you know i love you so much ♥
|
|
|
[
Jan
17
2005 @ 02:29pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
blank |
] |
wow ya i havent updated in awhile, basically sheeit is the same, i still dont have my license and thats a long story which i dont feel like sharing but then lets see the team that i quit are #1 in the world and are going to switzerland france sweden and prague why did i quit? i shulda gone through the hell but o well i would be even more unhappy if i was doing that team but anyway lets see im going to get my license tommorow so thatll be fun i hope, umm so ya james and me dont talk anymore and as far as me and dave we are still just friends but o well im never gonna find the right guy and i have this huge fashon merchandising project so i needa to that today because it due tommorow but i think im going into school late or leaving early tommorow to go get my license i hope i go in late, im really tired and ina bad mood ya and cold turkey put me in a horrible mood so screw that the only way im gonna do that is if im with dave 24/7 lol and he knows that so when i do it again itll be because im around him all the time which will happen in the future or so he says but hey im out payce niggas ♥ me!
|
|
|
[
Jan
10
2005 @ 07:14pm ] |
Is love just a phase of infatuation? Where you feel so intoxicated you can't control it, & can never get enough
wow so ya im really hoping that something might come of me and dave but im just not sure....he still has my phone ....my stang didnt come in yet.....im dying of a tummy ache....im tired...i have alot of homework, so im gonna go upstairs and listen to music ♥
dave oh dave im hoping that you feel the same for me as i do you
|
|
| SO FUCKING MAD |
[
Jan
07
2005 @ 11:35pm ] |
alright so tonight started off really good i mean my parents told me im going car shopping tommorow and I hung out with Dave and hes sucha sweet guy....and me and him were in his car and then he tried starting it and it wouldnt start so he was like fuck and then i left my shit in rufos basement and dave went and got it but rufo has my phone and im dying wihtout my phone....and then my brother ryan called me and i thought i was gonna break down on the phone with him but im just doing it now and like he was like asking me all this shit and than brittany told some shit to rocco who told brad who told richard who told james who told my brother and then my brother was like caitlin and hten we talked and then i was like im so mad about james i still like him and everyone knows i do no matter how much i deny it but he got back with his ex gf who he was like omg i love you lets get married with.....and i've liked dave alot longer then ive liked james and i mean it just sux bcz im realy not sure if dave likes me i mean he acts like he does and hes not all about like doing shit he just likes to cuddle and kiss all the time but its not like hes getting any you know what i mean and i like that about him and i love hanging out with him it puts me in sucha good mood, and then my brother telling me about james just made everything seem so bad bcz now im like well dave just wants to fuck you james was on rebound and didnt really like you and nothing is going right at all....i just want someone to like me back who i like and I really wanna find it and i hope i find it with dave and it pisses me off when ppl make up shit about shit like about guys who i like as in saying o caitlin said you were going out when i only said THAT WE LIKE EACHOTHER there is a difference and i just feel like my heart always gets broken no matter what i do ive tried so hard ive even tried not to try so hard and that was when dave started calling and im so attracted to him and hes sucha sweeetheart.....i miss the days when i was happy i needa square ♥
|
|
|
[
Jan
05
2005 @ 05:01pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
morose |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
michelle branch -goodbye to you |
] |
alright so my oldest brother brandon comes and picks up me and kevin from school today and i get in the back an james' coat was back there and his phone was in the cup holder? hmm alright so then my brother brandon drops kevin my other brother off and takes me to the ortho....then i go with brandon to plow and shovel snow for a lil bit and when i get home my brother ryan is in the shower and james was at my house but i couldnt see him anywhere, i was trying to act like i wasnt looking for him then i thought well maybe he isnt there but then i asked ryan if he could take me to jenns house but he couldnt bcz he had to go plow my uncle mikes shop so then james is standing right behind him and he didnt even say hi to me...then im crying then my mom cals my brother and asks him to ask james why he always makes me cry and james go she wouldnt cry over me she hates me how do i hate him? i dun get it and life sux brooke just keeps being a bitch to me and i dont get why all she does is make me cry and cry and cry
|
|
| SMOKING |
[
Jan
04
2005 @ 02:54pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
kelly clarkson-since you been gone |
] |
so ya today i had a field trip lol to oakbrook mall and spent like alot of money lol :) but im still missing someone o well im not sure he will ever notice me:( and im upset with myself for doing something on new years that i shouldnt have but what can i say shit happens.......so heres my new lil theory
I'm never going to find my true love, so I might as well live my life and have fun and since every guy i like has gotten what they wanted then left me....it's just how sheeit is going to be from now on
♥
:(
|
|
| im sad :( |
[
Dec
28
2004 @ 09:34pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
god i miss you james |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
michelle branch -goodbye to you |
] |
Everytime I feel alone, I blame it on you you just bring me down so i'm counting my tears till i get over you sometimes i watch the world go by i wonder what its like to wake up every single day smile on your face you never tried:-\ James I miss that night when you told me that I was beautiful, you put a smile on my face and falling asleep on you was like a dream that had finally come true when you whispered in my ear and kissed me on my cheek i wanted that night never to end, you made me happy for the first time in a long time and I miss you:-( tears cried since you've been gone 99,999,002,516,452,120,054,125
this is all i can think about and that number keeps getting bigger and bigger i miss you so much and i cant wait for new years so we can be us again bcz i cant keep saying goodbye to you
|
|
|
[
Dec
22
2004 @ 06:12pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
blank |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
none |
] |
1) First of all, how old are you? ill jsut say 16
2) Do you believe in reincarnation? nope
3) Would you rather be deaf or blind? blind bcz i love looking at everything around me
4) If you found out your best friend was gay/lesbian, what would you do? if it was one of my gf i think id be pretty sad and then if it was a guy friend i think id laugh but hey hed be a good shopping buddy
5) Do you consider yourself a good listener? yea 6) Would you rather be short or tall? short
7) Would you rather be overly happy and poor, or overly wealthy and happy? overly wealthy and happy. duh what kina questiobn is that 8) Would you consider your relationship with your parents bad, okay, good? umm lets just say right now between bad and okay
9) Do you like to dance? of course lol
10) Are you shy to ask someone out? yup thats hte guys job
11) Do you like to talk on the phone? ya im on it all the time but i like in person alot better
12) Would you rather go on a walk or watch tv? walk
13) What's your dream honeymoon place? eveyrone says hawaii and although its nice id rather go to egypt
14) What would be the first thing you'd change about yourself? everything
15) Do you think boys or girls have it easier? boys
16) If you had a round-trip ride in any time machine, where would you go? Vail colorado when i was there for a month with my best freidnz it was the last time i remember being hapy
17) If you could be invisible for a day, what would you do? see whats so different aabout popular ppl and what makes them soo fuckin popular
18) Do you like Adidas, Nike, Fila, or Reebok [or any other brand]? yeah i liek em all 19) If you could change your name, what would it be? iuno i want my son to be named carmine like the Gotti son 20) If you were in a theater and someone was crying, would you laugh? no id prolly cry too
21) Have you ever thought you were going to die? yeah a few times
22) What's the hardest thing about growing up? social life in high school its not school itself bcz i can get through classes and sheit but just people at school are so immature and think if your not popular now your a failure at life FUCK THAT 23) Have you ever gone skinny dipping? Would you ever? nope....f course if i was with ppl who i liked
24) What little unknown talents do you possess? i love ice skating i have a good singing voice 25) Would you eat a bowl of live crickets for $40,000? hmm no but then yes bcz than i could buy my 2004 SVT cobra supercharged with chrome 20" rims 26) If this Saturday, you could do ANYTHING you wanted, what would you do? i would make things better between me and james and then to make up have incredible sex with him lol
27) What's the worst word(s) you know? cunt i would kill someone if they called me that what can i say i take after my aunt aka B-rads mom
28) If there would be one thing about yourself that you could change, what would it be? umm you already asked this but EVERYTHING but my hair i think
29) Have you ever wanted to run away? Run where? yes Cali or Vail colorado
30) What's your worst fear? commiting suicide bcz everyone says that the look on ppls faces who do that looks like they regret what they did and that they didnt want to die they just wanted things to be okay for them and things to cahnge
31) What is your dream car? 2004 SVT Cobra in brick red with red leather interior supercharged with chrome rims aka james' car but in brick red o yeah and red gauges i could go on about my car forever
32) Do you sleep with a stuffed animal? yes Dexter I've had him since i was 3 hes a dog with a flannel santa hat on and his tognue sticks out hes very cute and has been there for me through ERYTHING
33) Have you ever felt you were in love? ya i thought so but ive learned not to elt anything go to my heart 34) If you were stranded on a deserted island with one person, who would it be? James bcz then i could make things better between me and him and that would be the most perfect thing ever
35) What is your favorite color? pink
36) What guy/girl do you want more than anyone else? James Addelizi
37) If you could be any animal what would you be? my dog max bcz hes never sad
38) What is your favorite gum? prolly orbit wintergreen flavor
39) How do you eat an Oreo? im allergic to milk
40) Do you eat chicken fingers with a fork? sometimes
41) Do you eat the stems of broccoli? yes
42) If you could do anything to the person you hated most what would it be? well since im not so good at standing up for myself id prolly actually wanna tell this person how i truly feel about them and then beat the shit outta them and prolly jst hope they never talk see hear or walk again o yea and i cut one by one there balls off :)
|
|
|
[
Dec
21
2004 @ 11:00pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
depressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
green day -blvd of broken dreams |
] |
I met you on waht i thought was the worst day of my life and you made it better then i began to like you and the day you left me i realized was the worst day of my life bcz now i have no one to make those other bad days better
so yeah my life keeps getting shitier and shitier and i cant seem to forget about these things and it jsut sucks bcz then i get reminded of past heartbreaks and as we all know past heartbreaks suck no matter what ♥
|
|
|
[
Nov
21
2004 @ 06:44pm ] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
indescribable |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
perfect circle -imagine |
] |
last night was okay lexi and brooke came over adn i was soo excited thought it was gonna be amazing bcz i was gonna chill with Dave but he had work so then i felt stupid fr telling lexi and brooke to come over :( and i was all sad that i didnt get to hang out with him bcz i was all excited like i couldnt wait lol but then kumar came and got us and we drove around for a lil bit it was fun bcz i wasnt by myself and lexi and brooke are soo nice like i had never hung out with lexi and shes super nice! lol but ya and like i called james and ya i wanted to go to chicago with him but i couldnt bcz they werent coming home till today or like really late and shit and i dun think my mom would go for me ging to chicago with a 20 year old but ya......and then today i went bored outta my mind i had to get up and go to church then like i sat around my house al day jkashglk it was boring and like i like think too far into things and ive been thinking alot lately just about everything and its annoying like ill just go in my room and sit and listen to music and just think and everything and iuno i like confuse myself its crazy so yea this weekend well friday was realy fun and everything..and i had a new experience lol brookey o ya and BAC diet all the way!!!!!!!! me and you brooke seiroulsy! we are gonna keep eachother on it im soo excited!! luv ya girly well imma go and talk on the phone lol so just ya payce out niggers ♥
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
|
|
|
|